Monday, 27 October 2008

Overdue Lift Moan

With apologies to my esteemed colleague to told me to blog about this some weeks ago...

I work on the 8th floor of our office building. The 8th floor is the top floor. These are my rules about what I will chose to be annoyed by in reference to users of the lift from other floors in the bullding:

  • Anyone who works on the 1st or 2nd floor should take the stairs up unless they have a noticeable disability (if your disability is not noticeable then tough, get a proper disability or expect my silent seething).
  • The person who actually queued in front of some of my colleagues to get a lift to the 1st floor last week - you could at least have had the decency to look ashamed of yourself.
  • People who are travelling to the employment tribunals service on the 4th floor - it's OK, I don't work there, you can drop the hammed-up limp and the shallow breathing.
  • Anyone who works on the 4th floor down should take the stairs down.
  • When I arrive at your floor in the middle of the building and I tell you the lift is going up, that is NOT an invitation for you to join me in a fun ride up and down the building. I don't want to spend any more time than is strictly necessary in what is effectively a cupboard with a stranger. Why do you?
  • People who work for the company who have offices on the 1st and 7th floor should have their own dedicated lift - it's too annoying stopping one floor away from my departure point AND my destination for you.
  • "Service Lift - Do Not Use" does not apply to me.

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